Grammar Nazis: Our last hope

In a world where spelling, context, and proper sentence structure is all but ignored by anyone under the age of 25, what was once the scourge of online discussion threads may be the only ones who can keep the English language alive for future generations. The Grammar Nazzi (Also referred to as Grammer Police in homage to their kin, The Spelling Police) spend a disproportionate amount of time trolling around online forums and comment threads, not learning or contributing to the collection of knowledge found therein, but rather to point out to unsuspecting posters their abysmal inability to properly wield the Queen’s idiom. Grammar Nazis are far from revered and are in fact considered by some to be one of the lowest forms on life on the internet, just above spammers and MySpace pervs. This however does not negate the value of the selfless service that they provide to the interwebz at large.

This has been a bad few years as far as language is concerned. As a devout English speaker it pains me to see my mother tongue butchered the way it has. Being monolingual, I can’t speak with any certainty about the state of any of the other 3 languages in existence, but I get the distinct impressions that English has been the martyr for everyone else. Displaying for all to see the evils of late night blogging. chatroom hijinx and the rapid decay of formal structure that follows when left unabated. It has been the endless march of the Grammar Nazis that have brought this evil to light. Standing on “Reply to this” soup boxes, they have made us realise and face the horrible truths of our lazy, grammatically incorrect ways.

There was a time when they would not have had a place in popular culture. In fact there was a time when the act itself would be fruitless. I speak of a time gone by when language was respected, and the quill was only wielded by a select few whom, I assume, had taken a blood oath to protect the words with which they welted us with the weight of their worldly wisdom. Before everyone with a random thought in their head had an avenue to present it to the world, there was no need for policing. The power resided with a select few and there was order in the world. As those days are now long behind us so too is our collective trust that sentences have proper word placement and context. Because of this we owe acknowledgment, if nothing else, to the men and women living in basements who have answered the call to correct us and be loathed for all their days.

Shun them if you must, but they are truly the heroes of the written word, champions of transcribed speech and the last line before we free fall into the never ending abyss of linguistic hell.